In 2017 I was so concerned for my mental health, believing what I was seeing was wrong or that I was psychotic, that I dropped out of a math phd program because I became depressed and isolated feeling like I saw a level of reality that no one else did.
I started selling my things, and slowly making it so that I would move out of Seattle because I had kept saying a virus was going to hit Seattle. A Chinese virus, I kid you not.
I went to several doctors but never told them of my theories because when I wrote them on Reddit, I was called schizophrenic. Someone even said “It’s like I’m watching A Beautiful Mind but in real life” and that sat with me… for a while.
A friend of mine who was an undergrad at Princeton actually listened to my theories when I felt I had no one else to talk to, and then a guy I was dating said Princeton was a good school, so I left Seattle for Princeton before the virus shut everything down.
While in graduate school, I started studying biochem and microbiology, because I wanted to understand what viruses are and then I discovered that medical science knows nothing about bacteria or viruses, that germ theory was wrong, and that we collectively needed to go back to Botany to understand how viruses work, particularly neuroviruses.
I was still fucked up mentally, and couldn’t communicate to my graduate program what was happening, but in 2019, I told my boyfriend at the time that everything was going to be moved online and that’s when I bought a Surface Pro on craigslist, to prepare for indefinite online instruction. I attempted to show students at the UW the benefits of the technology and I even talked to my real analysis prof about how cool it is (I miss him he’s awesome).
But the graduate program eventually didn’t know what to do with me. I was seemingly insane, depressed and antisocial. I felt like there were more important things to study besides pure mathematics (I was studying differential geometry, algebraic geometry and category theory) and felt that my classmates were simply using mathematics to escape from the world.
…So I left. And I came to Princeton to study Physics, so that I can apply my out-of-this-crazy-world pattern recognition to Medicine. I knew that Princeton has a strong analysis and fluid modeling program, and I have researched many of the professors in the mathematics department and their work on Navier Stokes solely for this purpose of diagnostic medical technology.
I created mAAd Academy first to study schizophrenia, and then eventually psychopathy, where I created a theory of psychopathic autoimmunity.
Now here I am, after experimenting with drugs, diet and pharmacology, I have put myself into remission, despite the collective ignorance of doctors around me.
See, Descartes was a fine mathematician, great even. But his duality of body and mind has so insidiously poisoned medicine that people believe their psychology malady to be disconnected from the physical vessel they inhabit. I have theories of medicine and psychiatry that I feel need to be tested, so that diagnostic medicine can improve for everyone involved.
Princeton has state-of-the-art labs and technology and is a sort of center to many other great institutions on the east coast. I like that type of connectedness, and felt Seattle was a bit too isolated for my liking. I want to collaborate with more scholars in various fields, for my work is highly interdisciplinary.
Mental State: zero-carb ketogenic diet for approximately two weeks